Witty Rants

3 Years of Tiers and Tears

First off, let me just say this. CAKE IS NOT "EASY AS CAKE". Whoever said that- fuck her. Or him. Cake is straight up HARDCORE mafia-level serious business. Not only is it an art, but it's a science. Every little detail matters. Whether or not you sifted your flour, what kind of flour you use,… Continue reading 3 Years of Tiers and Tears

Deep Rants, Witty Rants

The Cracked-Out-Unicorn That Could. or Couldn’t. Whatever.

Lately? It's like I'm either a cracked-out-unicorn pooping glitter and vomiting sunshine or an over-sedated, insomniac, depressed-about-being-depressed-about not-knowing-what-he's-depressed-about Eeyore (if you don't know who Eeyore is, we can't be friends. Good day sirs and ma'ms). Either way I'm some kind of horse, apparently. So that's just peachy. Unicorn or Eeyore. Horse or horse. (Shut up… Continue reading The Cracked-Out-Unicorn That Could. or Couldn’t. Whatever.

Witty Rants

Write & Let Write. Don’t be a DICK.

I'm not ignorant. At least not most of the time. Like except when people who claim to be family or friends or people who "care" give me "healthy" advice like "Starbucks is too expensive you should really consider cutting back." Whhhatt??! How fucking DARE you! You know NOTHING. You are NOTHING! :::slurping noises from my… Continue reading Write & Let Write. Don’t be a DICK.

Poetry/Freestyle Rap (your choice..), Soul-Searching Rants, Witty Rants

January 30, 2003

Below is a poem that I've copied word-for-word from my high school journal. I was 17 years dumb. I don't write this type of stuff anymore BUT Paul's recent poem made me slightly nostalgic of the old wanna-be-poet I was once-upon-a-teenage-time AND I've  been meaning to reconnect to my teenage self via my old journals… Continue reading January 30, 2003

Soul-Searching Rants, Witty Rants

Lost Fox. If Found- Please Proceed to Nearest Cliff and Toss.

Oh these awkward "restarts"  when it's been SO stupidly long since you've seen or heard from eachother that neither really knows how to break the ice or how to do anything really...except fidget around uncomfortably trying to avoid the inevitable eye contact...until (fuckk) there's that split second of inevitable eye contact so you both shadily… Continue reading Lost Fox. If Found- Please Proceed to Nearest Cliff and Toss.

Lifestyle Rants, Soul-Searching Rants, Witty Rants

On Turning THIRTY!

It feels like just yesterday I was sixteen and SWORE I was a grown ass woman who was way beyond my years and had it all pretty much figured out: graduate college with a bachelors at age 22. No exceptions. Get accepted into pharmacy school no later than 23. Graduate with my PharmD before 27. Plan my… Continue reading On Turning THIRTY!