Deep Into The Foxhole, Humor, Lifestyle Rants, Money Rants, Soul-Searching Rants, Witty Rants

Preach On, Preachy Preachin’ Preacher!

Ok first of all? I know a lot about life. When people open their souls to me and tell me their struggles (may the Lort (that wasn't a typo) be with them) I'm always thinking to myself meh. Been there done that bought the t-shirt, the mug, the keychain, and the bumper sticker. What else… Continue reading Preach On, Preachy Preachin’ Preacher!

Letters

An Unhappy Mom With Things To Say

Word for word. That's how I graced the subject line of the e-rant that I just electronically shipped to the manager of the gym where my son has been receiving mixed martial arts training for the past 3 months.You already know that this title was well fucking calculated. I'm sure this guy gets TONS of… Continue reading An Unhappy Mom With Things To Say

Witty Rants

3 Years of Tiers and Tears

First off, let me just say this. CAKE IS NOT "EASY AS CAKE". Whoever said that- fuck her. Or him. Cake is straight up HARDCORE mafia-level serious business. Not only is it an art, but it's a science. Every little detail matters. Whether or not you sifted your flour, what kind of flour you use,… Continue reading 3 Years of Tiers and Tears

Deep Rants, Witty Rants

The Cracked-Out-Unicorn That Could. or Couldn’t. Whatever.

Lately? It's like I'm either a cracked-out-unicorn pooping glitter and vomiting sunshine or an over-sedated, insomniac, depressed-about-being-depressed-about not-knowing-what-he's-depressed-about Eeyore (if you don't know who Eeyore is, we can't be friends. Good day sirs and ma'ms). Either way I'm some kind of horse, apparently. So that's just peachy. Unicorn or Eeyore. Horse or horse. (Shut up… Continue reading The Cracked-Out-Unicorn That Could. or Couldn’t. Whatever.

Witty Rants

The Book Of Ely

I'm a stubborn bitch person woman bitch- always go with your first instincts, boys and girls and never delete your first multiple choice answers on exams and when in doubt always choose "C"- ok. Let's try this again. ...With the delusional exception of winning a multi-million dollar lottery that I've never even purchased a ticket… Continue reading The Book Of Ely

Money Rants, Relationship Rants

Playing With Fire

It's 2017. While some moms or dads have the opportunity to stay home and raise the kids while their partner runs around the corporate world like the Headless Horseman on crack- it's more common that both parents are out there hustling day and night trying to make ends meet for eachother and their beloved spoiled-as-FUCK… Continue reading Playing With Fire

Money Rants, Witty Rants

Broke-Rich Bitches Be Like…

..."Cell phone disconnected as fuckkkk but I'm goin' to Mexico on a cruise bitchhhhh!!" (True story). So you're already questioning the validity of my opinion on what defines a "broke bitch"- I get it. It's more like irresponsible-as-fuck-bitch-who-will-never-have-her-priorities-in-life-straight-bitch. But in my defense, for all you know I am guilty of religiousless Β (I'm pretty sure that's… Continue reading Broke-Rich Bitches Be Like…