These past few weeks. Man. Guys. Ladies? Children of all ages? (Here the fuck we go...let the circus of words begin!) I Just have to tell you. But first I just have to tell you that this isn't a rap song or a poem. I'm just pacing myself here so that I can somehow try… Continue reading Hello Emotional Instability?… It’s Me… Ely. I Miss You.
Dear Starbucks; Sigh. Hey sexy. It's me. I know I know! You've been worried about me. Another year vanished into non-existence and a new year has graced us and yet, you haven't seen or heard from me in a good 2, going on 3 weeks now? Geez. Did you wonder if I was dead by… Continue reading The Break-Up Letter of the Century
For the past few weeks I've been digging deep for more light-hearted, funnier-ish, look-at-me-I'm-not-always-a-dark-sociopath content. Besides the two victims whom I wished explosive diarrhea upon (I'm sure it was justified), I think I've been doing ok-ish. Give me some credit. It's so tough. It's tough trying to aim for this positive, bright, encouraging, forever-witty, entertaining… Continue reading Lost, Frightened Puppy. Does Not Understand SEO’s or Adwords.
It's Thirsty Thursday ya'll! Who's thirsty for a rant?! [Confession] I admit it. I just made this Thursday thing up in light of my horrid time management skills because this post was supposed to be ready for WTF is on yo mind Wednesday but that clearly didn't happen and rants can't just marinate on the… Continue reading Thirsty-For-A-Rant-Thursday: A Biblical Boob Bitching
When I was pregnant with my son, I felt like I was floating on a marshmallow cloud of motherly bliss. I had already been blessed with my perfect little princess and I also had a beautiful stepdaughter but I wanted my handsome little prince more than anything I had ever wanted in my life. Life… Continue reading In Which I Consider Selling My Son To The Black Market
I planned on keeping these posts in list-format, but I'll make some particular exceptions if there is a more specific thing to rant about on any given Wednesday. I think I'll just go with the flow and with whatever I'm feeling. Also? How impressed are you? 3 weeks in row?! That's typically not even how… Continue reading WTF-Is-On-Yo-Mind-THURSDAY-Because-I-Have-A-Solid-Excuse-For-Skipping-Wednesday
Ok first of all? I know a lot about life. When people open their souls to me and tell me their struggles (may the Lort (that wasn't a typo) be with them) I'm always thinking to myself meh. Been there done that bought the t-shirt, the mug, the keychain, and the bumper sticker. What else… Continue reading Preach On, Preachy Preachin’ Preacher!
It's almost official- I'm still working on it- but I've started my side-hustle web and blog. I've done a lot of mental back and forth with this site- not knowing what approach to take- and then it hit me. There's no approach. Just be your fucking self, and do the damn things. Here's my first… Continue reading The CEO of Keepin it Real
When I was "younger" I had a mostly cliché vision of what my life was supposed to look like by the time I hit my 30's and I'm sure most if not all of you can relate to this vision in some shape or form: Own the "perfect" home (insert your definition of "perfect" here… Continue reading Give a Little Fox
When I started blogging again towards the end of June last year- PS: I totally missed my re-bloggaversary, but I'm still accepting gifts and trophies and any kind of attention that doesn't require me to be seen or touched or directly spoken to- I sort of made an unspoken pact to leave my kids out… Continue reading Low-Key Badass Parenting