Witty Rants

3 Years of Tiers and Tears

First off, let me just say this. CAKE IS NOT "EASY AS CAKE". Whoever said that- fuck her. Or him. Cake is straight up HARDCORE mafia-level serious business. Not only is it an art, but it's a science. Every little detail matters. Whether or not you sifted your flour, what kind of flour you use,… Continue reading 3 Years of Tiers and Tears

Witty Rants

The Book Of Ely

I'm a stubborn bitch person woman bitch- always go with your first instincts, boys and girls and never delete your first multiple choice answers on exams and when in doubt always choose "C"- ok. Let's try this again. ...With the delusional exception of winning a multi-million dollar lottery that I've never even purchased a ticket… Continue reading The Book Of Ely

Caking & Baking, Witty Rants

Stupid-Proof Baking: 101

  Welcome to class fellow wanna-be-bakers. I'm your common-sense instructor, Ely. What are my qualifications you ask? I have a PHd in Youtubeology with a minor in Pinterestopathy. Any further questions?  Fantastic. As you may or may not know, 8 months ago I invested my mind, my soul, my sanity, and every penny of $600.00… Continue reading Stupid-Proof Baking: 101

Caking & Baking

The Sweetest Dream

If you still don't know shit about me that's cool. I have narcissistic tendencies. I'm a creature of self-love, thus, I rarely mind showing my (inner) self off (because I love my fabulous soul however, my body nooootttt so much!) 7.5 months ago I was possessed by the idea of decorating an Easter cake with… Continue reading The Sweetest Dream