Humor, Letters, Relationship Rants, Witty Rants

Dear Irma;

Hey big momma!I see you girlfriend. Rest assured, the world sees you! You had a point to make, and listen honey- lord knows you're out here making your fucking point. You're one big, bad, crazy, scary bitch, I gotta give it to you! We are impressed, to say the least. Everyone is out here hating on you- ruthlessly… Continue reading Dear Irma;

Witty Rants

Paulo’s Kitchen: Peanut Butter Samwich

Because my blog friends, are PHENOMENAL and I could NOT help but repost this hysterical post that Paul dedicated to me, in a SUCCESSFUL attempt to distract me from Irma- and Chef Paulo posts are my absolute fave! If you haven’t read any of his Chef Paulo posts, I’m not sure what you’re actually doing with your lives! You have GOTTTAAAA! I can’t even. I nearly LOST it! Too clever Paul! So thankful, honestly. This was beyond words!

The Captain's Speech

The following episode of Paulo’s Kitchen is dedicated to my friend, Ely, who is bracing for the impact of Hurricane Irma. Stay safe, Ely.

Previously on Paulo’s Kitchen, Cameraman Sam got under Paulo’s skin during filming.

“Up shut it, Samson!”

“Shut up your face, Samuel!”

“That’s enough out of you, Sam Antonio!”

“SAMBRERO!”

Tonight, Chef Paulo and Sam are back in the same room for the first time since they, allegedly, fought over who got to the stall in the washroom at work first. Will Sam keep his mouth shut? Will Paulo shut it for him? Find out, NEXT.

Ciao! Bonjour! And hello! Welcome back, Paulomaniacs! I am Chef Paulo and this is my kitchen!

Thank you for joining me. I hope you brought your appetite. If not, eh, what can you do? And no, I don’t have extra appetites to give out. I don’t give out freezies! Oh wait…

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